Tuesday, March 31, 2009

tigger doesn't like to exercise now!

I am nearly convulsed in muscle spasms, thanks to my 2 day escapade with my step routine, my situps and Michael Jackson. Just because Thriller turned 25 doesn't mean that I am still a spring chicken. I love that I watched a video of Kenny Loggins doing Footloose at this age and the speed is about 1/2 and the energy. I have to work up to the Thriller workout routine that I invented upon hearing it was 25 years old like my marriage.
Thank God for my sister and health consultant who cheers me on and gives me hope when I cannot get out of the bed, like this morning. What do I do? Jo? Do I give up at this age? Is my body saying, no more step routines forever? I will take one more day off and then I will decide again tomorrow as to whether I should ever exercise again.
I am happy with natural hair this week. My love and remembrance of the old ladies means that one day I can have my hair not even touch a blow dryer and the next day I can have it straight as a pin. We live in America, now. It is a free country and we even have a Black President! I should wear an afro! naaaa. ;xooo

After hearing Kenny, he healed my spasms for a minute and I was able to walk. LOL

Saturday, March 28, 2009

I used to get so mad at Dad for singing the wrong words to a tune...

He did it on purpose, in front of me. He loved to see my face when he forgot the words. Now I do that to my little ones. Is that Pokeyman on the tv? They get livid. I made such a mistake saying that it was in Pride and Prejudice that Jane was looking in the mirror. I know its in there somewhere but it isn't chapter 1. Oh well, I will find it.
My celebration of Aunt Ra Ra's birthday began as a result of her calling me. The only thing that I can remember from March 28th, 1989 is that Aunt Roz didn't come and now the thought of her takes my mind off my own griefs. I wonder if she knew that it would do that? Doing hair and celebrating the perfection of the Aunties and talking about the old ladies enjoying themselves in their latter days at Trump fills the day, instead of hiding my head under my pillow.

My husband, "bless his heart," invited James Taylor to the celebration. Covers is the next CD you have to get. There is something human about cd's now that music is available, minus the soul of it. When you listen on line, you get a taste of the soul of it. When you have the whole composition, intact, you have almost the whole artist in your life. Virtual reality of his intention in the music. The only thing better is to have the sheet music in front of you with the earphones on when you listen. I have had no strength to listen to my treasure, between laments that I have done so little of my intentions with the three remaining girls and boys. And then I remember, it is Aunt Ra Ra's birthday. Lets bake a cake, lets listen to James and lets do a jig. Except now, I can't remember the words...:) LOL
JT is at it again!

Friday, March 27, 2009

Rain, Rain, Go away.

Come again another day. Today is a foggy day and I am enjoying the beauty of the sky, under the glum of the emotion of the day. It is the countdown to Aunt Ra-Ra's birthday. The day and the week that I concentrate on self care, for self care sake. Today's self care will be in my bed. Because my muscles can't move from yesterday's over doing it. OWWWW!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Work out till you feel the burn!

That was my day 2 motto. I can blame 9 of the extra inches on my whittled waistline on the 9 pregnancies, maybe; but, at least 1 of the inches is due to my lack of consistent discipline. Thank you, Mr. T for the disciplines of a carefully whittled waistline. Volleyball practice and the drills that we did, sent me into life with the chisle to whittle down my waist. I put it down somewhere along the way.
My shoulder has deteriorated due to the "uptown shake" I think. I don't know how you young people are able to still use the neck after the season of that dance. I did it a total of 5 times in my life and I will have bursitis in my neck till the day I die as a result. The new dance down here is something I don't even try to do. It would do me good to try. They do the hokey pokey and touch the floor and jump to the side alot. It is cute to watch and would be a good chisle to use on some of the other stubbornly fat parts of my body. But not today. I did my work out and sweating to the oldies, makes me feel a little younger.
In Pride and Prejudice, Jane starts out looking at herself in the mirror and considering the image before her. Michael Jackson's, Man in the Mirror, was my mirror this morning. My waist is 10 inches off target. I'll not talk about the other portions of fat that I have added to. Don't stop, till you get enough. I have to go to work so. I will continue to work on my morning routine. How about you? Any exercise tips or new dances that you would share with me. Email me the video, please??

by the way... If you guys would put instructions on the facebook for me. I could jump on. It is like a rollercoaster!

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I'm gonna make a change, for once in my life...

For once? How about for the hundredth time, already. Today starts my spring bootcamp for myself. That cushy seated job has put weight around my midrift. I woke again with a new resolve. This time, Michael Jackson's Thriller webpage has made it's way into my morning regimenMichael? I did a whole 10 minutes, I think? My weights, my stairs and my Michael Jackson and...I am sweating to the "oldies?". Michael Jackson is not old. He is well kept, like me? Well, I will be, after this Spring regimen gets into full swing. I had intention of walking a marathon, but the "old funk" got me down and I missed the deadline.

I remember measuring myself on that step and being able to lay down on there with my feet up on the wall and there was no one to walk down on top of me, because the rest of you guys were babies. I took that thought and went to my steps and did my routine with Michael and it did a number on my "funk". My hips are still about the same size, but I feel a little better.

I have also been reminiscing about the beautiful hair people in my life. I decorated my hair with a necklace in it, as though I had dred's like Jo, on Monday. Yesterday, I did a perfect braid in the back, like Lisa and today, I guess, I'll curl it. It is all working up to the perfect hair do for Aunt Roz's birthday.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Today, my sick young ones went back to school.

They were down for the count the last few days. The house was quieted from the usual wrestling and arguments because the boys were sick. They are funny, the two of them always trying to out do eachother. Ethan, at 9 is the reader and writer and now Wii expert and Ezra imitates everything the older boys do. This causes conflict several times a day. Enoch has outgrown being upset about a little fellow who imitates everything, but not Ethan. He is still annoyed and rightly so. I saw in the video from the snowy day that Ezra takes advantage of his smallness and catches them in the stomach with a punch or two. We never had boys that liked boxing before, so he must be from my side of the family. I love to box. :)
The boys are growing well and I am extra glad that this time that the house is quiet it is because of the wellness of them and they are out at school.

Ethan's teacher is such a dear. I have never met anyone who listened quite like that before. She called to see how he was doing. She had also been down with some sort of flu recently. Every word that I said she listened and responded to. This was not just a courtesy call. I was so blessed to think that she thought about what I was saying. It made me think about what I was saying. So different from the way my children listen. Yea, right mom. :{ This is a new season for me. I am not the new mommy and my children really don't need the kind of attention that I am used to, like changing diapers and such. There is so much more laundry and bigger laundry. by the way. I'd better go to it now...

Saturday, March 21, 2009

I remember going over to Grandma Ruth's house

and catching her playing the memory game with Muffy. She thoroughly enjoyed her season of great-grandmothering. I can just imagine my mommy enjoying the time that she is up there with her great grand daughters.
I was pining this morning that Jacqueline is always the first one in our family. She gave mom the first grandchild and now she has mom all to herself with the great grands. I said, I am going to get ready, because I intend to ship that mother of mine down here when she gets decrepid and old and I get my grands.

I am not expecting any yet, But one day, years and years from now.

I always tell Ethan that he was the one who made Grandma Ruth smile in the latter days. So, I may be stuck down here in the South, but one day, God willing, I am going to gather my grands and their decrepid old Great grandmother around me and we will have some time with her too. Nyyyaaa!
I am jealous of those beautiful grands, my sister has, but I can distract myself with my precious ones also.
Love you guys and miss you guys.

This was a video of Ezra at his pancake day. His teacher made the crafts of the chefs cap for all of the children and Ezz wanted to wear his, even while eating.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

I ate so many sugar cubes and birthed...

A Sugar Cube Castle

this is the sugar cube castle, a Walker presentation for Ethan's 4th grade project. Everybody helped, including Uncle Elijah.

I remember how I loved to eat sugar. We used to play hide and seek at 113th and I would find the strangest places to hide. Once, I discovered that Mom had a hidden stash of sugar cubes, in the cabinet, next to the sink, in the kitchen. Everytime I would hide there, I would eat just a few of them. Usually, no one would find me under there; so I could stay there for a while, eating sugar cubes and hiding for the game.
One day, Mom was having the Rosarians over for tea and those little sandwiches. (Do you all remember cutting the crusts off of the sandwiches for the Rosarians?) Well, anyway, Mom said, Jayne, go get the sugar cubes from under the cabinet. GULP!
You know what came next. I was in trouble again. One day it was pie the next it was the sugar cubes. I would have loved to have seen Dad's face when Ethan decided to do his 4th grade projects in sugar cubes. What a perfect combination of Ben and me...Don't you think?

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

The St. Patrick's Day Parade

I really never realized that Uncle shared a name with the parade that happened every year. Uncle never seemed to have anything in common with St. Patrick except that he was beautiful. No one ever said that St. Patrick was beautiful, effective, in Ireland, I hear, but I will have to look up if he was beautiful as our Uncle Pat.

I think that we should make patties for St. Paddy's day. Don't you think that would be a wonderful West Indian comraderie with our Irish roots to make patties? I won't be home, so that is my excuse.

Elyse made something that I could've put in patties, last night, "bless her heart".

We are learning that "bless your heart" is what you say in the south when people mess up and you would castigate them, but your good breeding won't allow it. So bless her heart means that, she tried.:)

I go to work at 11:30 so my woman daughter is a great helper in the kitchen and her Irish eyes are smiling,(she's 1/8th Magee) she likes to remind us all. Her Grandma Rosalee was a chef and a green eyed beauty and she always makes us remember that we must celebrate St. Paddy. So I will make patties and she will say, Mom! bless your heart. :)

Monday, March 16, 2009

Coconut custard and me

I used the rest of the coconut from my rice and peas, to make a custard and it was delicious. It is not gone yet. I used to sneak small pieces of the coconut custard at home when I was young. Dad would laugh and giggle that I still have a piece of custard in my refrigerator as a symbol of selflessness to my children. He and I had eye to eye contact as to who took the last piece of coconut custard pie. I cannot tell a lie (? NOT) It is I, who took it everytime. Everyone knew who. He and I looked at eachother. Dad would say who? and then nevermind. You ate, what else? no food, just pie.

Enjoy it now, my custard pie children; because, a minute it is on the lips, but forever, it is on the hips. :)

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Between You and me and the...lampost.

I do remember that, occasionally, Dad would take his pointer finger and hit his lips intently; to mean, Don't tell Mom this or that. Nobody, but us have this secret.

"If I were you, I would do this or that"..., but...(and then the finger would go to his lips and that meant mum is the word.) Didn't you just love keeping a secret with dad. A sprinkle cookie left over that we split could be a secret. The fact that he was going to hide somebody's special treat, that they had mislaid in his drawer, never to return. might be another secret that we would keep. Secrets between dad and anyone were always fun.

He never kept secrets well, though. Anything I said to him, he would always repeat. He would meet a friend of mine and say, you are the one that, Jayne said steals or has a zit, is that true. Dad, that was between you and me and... is that what the lampost means?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Oh, well, You can't win them all! :(

Pooor Evvy.:( She's only a peer counselor and a flutist and a good student and...
But she didn't make the cut for the track team.
A whole week of staying after school and running at her hardest effort. She does the quarter mile in 1.15, but that didn't cut it.
I couldn't even talk to her for a whole week, she was so tired. She was #45 in the tryouts out of 46 people, but when the cuts were made, No Evvy.
I said, Ev, did you cry? Were you embarrassed? Nope. Next.

What's next, she asks? She is so resilient and fast. I can't keep up with her. How come Enoch doesn't want to try out for anything?

They have such an interesting dynamic, that duo. We call them thing one and thing 2 after the characters in the Cat in the Hat. The precociousness that was their toddlerhood and their middleyears has grown into a delightful humor in their teen time.

They are always cracking me up; with their antics. Thank God, no practical jokes, just funny stuff. They study well together and they interact well together, but what happens next year when En goes to Cox Mill High and Evvy's left behind. I am sad to think about it.
They are growing up and the dancers of the family. Enoch's hobby is imitating Adam Savani in dance and style, at home. At school, he's just a quiet child, I hear.
(like they tell me:() "Mom, I am getting ready to tell you a joke", is the joke of the family. I used to be important to them, now I'm just the newscaster.
He said, "Mom, I have to be careful that people don't think I'm smart because I wear glasses." I don't want to mislead people. That's okay, En, I said, nobody's fooled by the glasses, son. You either is smart, or you ain't! :)

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Write, right, rite, ("For the LOVE OF PETE")

Now we are attempting to wrestle word power into the intensely pictorial Walker mind. My blessed little ones and big ones challenge the grace of God in my soul as they resist my attempts at injecting vocab and verbal acumen into their lives. We have only one life to live and in this one, I have been retarded in my ability to pass on to my children the verbal ability that my dad passed onto me.
We spent hours in the car, spelling at eachother. He did the spelling and I did the listening. I spell like that, to them and they all look at me with glassy eyed ambivalence. The printer's daughter and the speller's daughter and the architect's daughter and the printer's grandson are illiterate. Eli Whitney's cotton gin and the Printing press have allowed us to learn and to spell.
Any and all ideas are welcome.

Monday, March 9, 2009

"Pick your poison..."

I remember how Dad would say, "how many do you think that this infraction deserves?" If we said 1, he would say ok, you will get 5. If we said 5 he would say ok, you may get 2 or 3. It was very hard to pick a number when it came to spankings. Heart pounding in your ears and conscience smarting from some bad behavior and then, to top it all off, choose your poison. That, I think was worse than the spanking itself. However many we got, the message was received. We always deserved more than we received.
If I were God, I know that there would be some mercy, but far less than there is. God showed me that one day in a dream. The snow was coming and I dreamed that there would be 10 feet of snow. Incapacitating the city. When I woke to the snow there was 10 inches of snow. The difference between my mercy and God's mercy was at least 100 times. God's interpretation of infinite for me in my finiteness. God's mercy is new everyday. Great is His faithfulness.

Micah---He has told you O man what is good and what the Lord requires of thee. But to do justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.

Help me Lord to love mercy!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

And Now it is Spring!

The pre-Spring fever seems to have passed from our house and a warm snap is felt in the weather around our area. The daffodils are dancing everywhere. From home to church, the world looked aglow with the scent and sights of Spring.
Last week's snowfall is, but a faint memory and the beauty of the warm damp ground is inviting a planting season.

It is this season where I am grateful for the beautiful memory of a new, new house when we first moved in. The memory of my freshly laid carpet stings my mind as I labor to try to find that, just moved in feel to my carpet. It has been tramped upon and beat upon and played upon and now to find the triangles that were my delighted carpet enjoyment is all but frustrating.

We entered this house on the first day, to the smell of the freshly laid carpet and linoleum. The glue was still warm and the triangles that I refer to are the triangles of the carpet fibers coming up off of the carpet. For weeks we would go to sleep and wake up to carpet fibers coming up off of the carpet and vaccuuming them down was fun. We made fiber balls and threw them at eachother. Finally, the carpet was worn enough to not produce those fibers in the night. We missed them when they were gone. Now, every once in a while, like when we get our tax return we splurge on a rental of the rug doctor to bring back the new love, my triangled carpets.

For Christmas, someone, from Church gave us a Kohl's gift card and I bought a "Floor shark". I really like that thing. It heats the water and mopping the floor with freshly heated chemical water is delightful also. I don't like the smell of heated ammonia, though:). Spic and Span or the other gentle cleansers smell wonderful when mopped in with the shark. It is a cleaning utensil that is my newest enjoyment.
It helps to get some of those muddy floors tolerable with the likes of my crew's hurricanes.

Saturday, March 7, 2009


Elyse is sick, now and she acts so much like Grandma Monica, it is hysterical...
I told her how Grandma would call Uncle Baaarrry with her West Indian accent. I cooked rice and peas and have been enjoying the flavor and the taste of it for a week. Pure blooded Walkers are allergic to coconut, except in pie. So, I have to eat my rice and peas behind their backs as they enjoy the macaroni. The older I get the more definitive the cultural differences become between the Boddens and the Walker traditions. They are quick to identify the differences and defend my rights to be a Bodden in a decisively Walker household. Not one of my children is a West Indian and to imagine Elyse acting like Grandma, without a smidgeon of West Indian is a humorous anecdote, in itself. I have to translate what she says in her stubborn fully American way into West Indian to understand it.
It has helped me so much to imagine the reality that she is so like my Grandma and that that is why we enjoy one another's company so much. She is like my right hand and now with the 2 girls designing and sewing and knitting around. I feel like Grandma has set up a sewing shop in my house down here.

She carries a big bag with all of her sewing ecoutrements, I'm not sure why, she never hems anybody's skirts at church. I still remember the speed with which Grandma could hem a skirt. 1 2 3 and it was all hemmed up. Not me. I will stay with a hem out for weeks and think nothing of it. Elyse has a huge bodice set up in her room which she tries the clothes upon to look at it before putting it on her own body. Their designer eye and their fitful fingers are destined to put some kind of product of seams and thimbles out there one day. Until then...."Listen to the joke?...Barry? those are the stories that I tell them...

Friday, March 6, 2009

Awwwww, Mom!

I never thought that would be a happy sound from my son. Awwwww, mom, little Spanky (Ezra) said to me this morning. The week long flu fever has broken and he is back to his normal self, maybe moreso. He is complaining and jumping around and what a delight to see him being himself, after a week of a limp and semiconscious 5 year old. I remember having the flu when I was little and I slept alot. I am rejoicing and happy to see him being his own naughty self.
It will still be a couple of days of grace before the naughtiness warrants a real spanking. For now, a verbal reproof, with a giggle under my breath at the insolence of being 5.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

"When We All Get to Heaven..."

20 Years ago today, Dad and Baby Ben
What a day of rejoicing that will be... When we all see Jesus, we will sing and shout the victory.

Benjamin Banneker Walker was born 20 years ago today. Each year I get strengthened to read another card of comfort. I get another word of encouragement from the Lord. Each year the Lord seems to unwrap my mummy shroud of pain and allow my pained heart to look back at some of the circumstances.
The scriptures say, can a woman forget her own son, she may, but He will never forget those who come to faith in Him.

I look forward to the grace of God and what He is doing and how He could reunite me with my eldest son. I pray for the grace to hang on until that day! Pray for me.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Yesterday, the clouds looked like a Dr. Seuss train

painted in the sky by a masterful artist and carrying fun and happiness for all of the children. There were swirls and curls as the clouds whisked by our morning window and we got the call at 5:40 to say that school was cancelled.

Hooray! Hip, Hip, Hooray! I think we have school so that children will appreciate the time that they are at home!
We had about 3 inches of snow, the most. The Cat in the Hat couldn't have brought a more fun day for the children. It is amazing that God can bring a holiday out of the sky.

We had about 3 inches of snow, the most. The Cat in the Hat couldn't have brought a more fun day for the children. It is amazing that God can bring a holiday out of the sky.
Before 7 they were outside filming the fun, which I haven't yet learned how to download to my blog, or I wouldn't have to write about it. I would just let you see the fun they had. Let me remind you that these are the same children who can't find their shoes at 7 oclock to catch the bus. Interesting how a snow day wakes everybody earlier. :)
Snow balls and snow angels, mud and soot and more mud and more cleaning for mommy.:(
It is all part of the fun!
The icey conditions made travelling and the roads difficult and we did have to take our time. We saw a few spins on Sunday night during the initial blizzard portion.
For me, the most beautiful part was the sunrise cloud train. I wouldn't have missed it. They went to Freedom Park, after I went to work where the best of the photos were taken. Enjoy!

Monday, March 2, 2009

The Snowy Day, By Ezra Charles-Anthony Walker

I was sick all night and when I woke up, the earth was covered with white. My sisters and brothers wrapped me up and blew my nose and out we went to make a video with me as the star and my siblings as side characters. We made snow balls and snow angels and snow pictures and then I got too cold and wet in the nose to stay outside. The snow was all the way up to my heels. We haven't seen snow like this in a long time. Not since we left New York, which is snow country.
I was too little to remember the snow in NY.
Anyway, I came inside and then we ate breakfast.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

March First.

What is a woman to do? is my question at the end of every February and God's answer, every year is March first. Now, I said, Lord, I've been Marching, what's next...
The answer is...March Second!

A hymn.
Father, I know that all my life is portioned out for me,
The changes that are sure to come, I do not fear to see,
I ask Thee for a present mind, Intent on pleasing Thee

Title- The Studious One!

Title-  The Studious One!
artwork by Elyse

Of biscuits and syrup

Of biscuits and syrup
tasty treats

Happy Saturday!

Happy Saturday!
a day at the Raptor Center.

Widdle Emmie in outer space school

Emmie jumped on the bus and off it flew out into the atmosphere. There was a set of clouds with turbulence right above the house and it took a few minutes for my Emmie to buckle her seatbelt. They hit the bump hard and it knocked my Emmie out of her seat and she bumped her head. The video camera came on and the monitor looked through and stated, Ms. Emmie, where are you? You are not in your seat. Where are you? I am alright I fell because I hadn’t buckled correctly. Well jump up Emmie we have a long way to go and you have to be buckled there is entirely too much turbulence in the stratosphere for you to unbuckle now. As soon as we are through this weather system there will be straight sailing but right now you must buckle. Emmie scrambled into the seat with intensity and purpose now. She watched every cloud pass her window and her nose was pressed to the window trying to see the top of the house as it drifted slowly out of sight. Soon they were not only out of sight of the house, the sun came out brightly and just as quickly they were putting on the atmospherical breathing apparatus and the outerspherical lights. The ABA and the OL. These precautions were to make them appear to be satellites to the radar as they were out in the ionosphere. Emmie knew all about this now. She had gone to the orientation and had a good breakfast and it took them 20 minutes for her to get out past the atmospherical pull and to feel the zero gravity. It would be 15 minutes before the gravity simulators would take effect, a glitch in the system which was being worked on. Until then, they enjoyed the couple of minutes of floatation, while being connected to the seats by belt. The first thing they saw everyday was the strataflotsam. The items which had been dumped into the atmosphere by earlier generations. What would their generation do about this ecological waste area that remained floating above their heads? This was a question for the generations. For now it was the area that they had to guide through on the way to school.

Midnight at the OASIS

Midnight at the OASIS
Sunset in Huntersville

My little Emmie

ran to the bus on the first day of the last year of school. 2 buns on the side of her head. She kissed me and ran at dawn to the bus. She was starting the adventure of a lifetime. I would never see that little girl again, she was going to woman school!

My Father and I 1989

My Father and I 1989

to the tune of Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme


Are you going to Mary Immaculate?

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

Remember me to the one who lived there,

He once was a true love of mine,

Tell him to buy me an acre of land,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

Between the muddy Hudson in Jamaica Bay,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine,

Tell him to sow in it seeds of pure cream,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

And build Ice cream mountains and buildings of whipped cream,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine,

Tell him to reap them with sickles of M&M’s,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

And chew bubble gum and eat till we’re done,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine.

Tell him to run it off down the motor parkway,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

After your done 50 pushups

and jog down the West Side Highway,

Then he’ll be a true love of mine…

(Don’t wait for me today dad, The kids are sick again, My tummy’s bulging again, My heart is aching again, And now there’s no love there…)

He once was, a true love of mine….So, Girls, I do beg you don't miss your Daddy,Apricots, Chocolate cherries and Pie,You have one short chance to see him on this side, Go visit him and let your light shine.