Thursday, November 29, 2012

A Week After Thanksgiving, Are we still Thankful?

My tummy is still full from our feast and this is the day that my heart starts to look around and find the things to complain about.  What a shortlived sentiment thankfulness is.  I am still thankful for all of the things that we celebrated last week.  Why are my eyes open to my pains and strains? 
I will think on the great things that God has done for me.
God is still good, a week after thanksgiving.  We have had a wonderful deliverance from health concerns.  We have relatively healthy lives and children.  We have friends and family that have poured love and assistance upon us, in our downtroddenness, this past year.  We have a relationship with God and many brethren are praying for us.

Friday, November 23, 2012

I Love How We Thank God!

There was no traffic on the way to the Thanksgiving Day Parade we attended in the mountains. We were excited, because the balloons that we get to see, when we go there are so massive that we can hardly keep them in view. First the cloud balloons amazed us and we were tantalized, wondering what mountainous imaginations would manifest themselves on this very Thankful Day.
Last year, I said Brother Marius had cloud duty, because there were no clouds in the sky.(He was my very aged Summer School teacher for health and never let us doodle in our notebooks, so if the sky has no clouds, I say that Brother Marius wouldn't let them doodle designs on the canvas of the sky) This year, I was hoping to see a few clouds, not too many. And I wasn't disappointed. Sometimes, I wonder what they have to do with Brother Marius to get clouds into the sky down here, because we have so few, very cloudy days and We have to put in an order for them, much ahead of time and they make photo appearances and then get swept into the backdrop.
All of a sudden, as if by accident these massive structures invaded the horizon. Ben, who was driving and Enoch, behind my head started instructing the rest of us to get the camera. En yanked Ezra out of his deepest unconsciousness to see the "first Balloons" as I call them. I am so glad that the clouds didn't decide to overtake the day and make us wait longer to see our fine and beautiful horizon. We had seen these beauties before, but it didn't seem like it. They always seem new and freshly washed from the storehouse. (I do sometimes wonder if they deflate them and put them back in the box when we go back home:) Those angels have some kind of chore keeping them fresh and inflatable year after year after year.
They kept hiding from us and we felt like we were playing dodgeball with the mountains trying to catch a glimpse of them in and out of our sight and then they were enveloping us.
All of a sudden the parade began, bison, goats, ponies and other sundry animals started popping up to our right in the car. They decorated our "commute" and we were in awe of God's magesty to send them to us on our path on Thanksgiving Day. You couldn't see a bunch of more committed "city slickers" gawking at the country scenery, as if we were on 5th Avenue. The stars took a backseat to the friendly deer, who seemed to want to have some turkey with us in our enjoyments. Our bellies were stuffed at the perfect Holiday feast of sights and sounds and sumptuosities. We are so grateful to our friends for this kind sharing of their family meal with us. Now Thank We All Our God.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Are We Ready to be Thankful?

So very many people have blessed us this year. Sickness and difficulty have trodden us sore and were it not for the warfare that is waged by the People of God on our behalf, we should have been trampled mercilessly by unbelief and grumbling. God uses ordinary people, alright. We have seen, firsthand, how God uses His Church to further His cause upon the earth;ie., the family, close and far who have encouraged and come to our aid in so many countless and varied ways; the brethren, who have spoken life into our souls and given much for our care; the Pastors, who have prayed specifically for us and our family and preached encouragements to press on, by faith; the hospitals and doctors and nurses who have serviced us and instructed us on health issues. We are ready to be Thankful. Now we do Thank God for all His mercies and benevolences and when we are tempted to think hard thoughts of Him, He sends people who bring little pieces of Him, to remind us how big His love really is. And even bigger than that?:) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ When all Thy mercies, O my God, My rising soul surveys, Transported with the view, I'm lost In wonder, love and praise.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~```` Unnumbered comforts to my soul Thy tender care bestowed, Before my heart was e'er aware From whence these comforts flowed.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`` When worn with sickness, oft hast Thou With health renewed my face; And when in sin and sorrows sunk Revived my soul with grace. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ten thousand thousand precious gifts My daily thanks employ; Nor is the least a cheerful heart That tastes those gifts with joy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Through ev'ry period of my life Thy goodness I'll pursue, And after death, in distant worlds, The glorious theme renew. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Through all eternity to Thee A joyful song I'll raise; But O! eternity's too short To utter all Thy praise! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thursday, November 15, 2012

I've gotten up again from my birthday blues...

I am so low in serotonin, it takes very little to knock me down. Just the reminder of a birthday and I have fallen, again. Thank God for brethren and churches that are there to pick me up again. It is like falling into a deep pit. As soon as I look at the faith of that youngster who birthed these bunch of children, I fall into the hole. The sermon and the services on Sunday were enough to assist me and I am wiping off myself to start afresh. I won't look down. It was so encouraging to look into the Word of God and today it was time to remember Emily. How many times we reproved her for her mouth. A Soft Word turns away wrath...We repeated it again and again and after awhile she stopped name calling as often. We remembered the tender tastebuds she had throwing up at every new taste that hit her tongue and her convinced mind that she saw Jesus coming down from the sky with a plane that past. How diverse were the situations that we had to deal with with her. How more similar to my faith journey of misunderstandings of what God might be saying in this or that passage. She always came with her own understanding to be pried from her clutching grasp and replaced with truth. Elyse always said, I want to know what God is saying. Em always said I already know what God is saying. I want to do it my way. I identify with both ways in some part of my being. This rainy Thursday, has me praising God for fresh promises of new fulfillment and good memories of how God has pried my personal misunderstandings from my clutch to replace it with His Higher Ways. The reminder of the study that got me to this point in the morning service, from Pastor Paxton and the marching music and rejoicing that infused the joy of the Lord through Worship and Praise were great reminders of what has helped me walk in past days and throughout my life. I am grateful that we are not left to our own devices and I would be stuck on the rocks were it not for the Church of Christ and the means of Grace in every race and creed and tongue that have been used by God to "deliver me". Thank You, Jesus.

Friday, November 9, 2012

26 Years ago today! The Delight of our thankful hearts began.

We were already friends and husband and wife. But something happened that would make us parenting partners.
I had absolutely no intention of giving birth on this day 26 years ago. It wasn't like the subsequent births, where I was so anxious and uncomfortable at the end of the time. As far as I was concerned, I had a couple of days to go. We had taken some of the classes for childbirth, but not all of them. It was a Sunday and I felt completely in control, for the very last time in my life. {Grandma Ruth used to say of that state of being "Youth is wasted on the young!"} I had a delightful weekend with my friend over the house. We were giggling like girls and ready to take another Lord's Day Sabbath enjoying the presence of God and oneanother. This was not to be. Breakfast was made by my friend of scrambled eggs and we had discussions about hard or soft cooked scrambled and which were preferred by each. Every sentence stuck in my throat as I saw the eggs a few more times that day. I swore that I would never eat eggs again. It was so thoughtful of her to take care of my husband for me and give me leave for a leisurely preparation for the day. We had a gorgeous, old fashioned tub in that lovely appt. I knew I should have showered, but we only had a tub. Bathing after eating breakfast pulled the plug. Oh dear, today? Right now? Maybe not? Now, I know what happened, then, I was guessing. Owwwwww! the first labor pain hit. Oh no, this is not at all what I had expected. I am definitely, positively not strong enough or woman enough to become a mother today? I said no. Let's think this over, now. I must have had about 10 labor pains before I told Ben. He was very ready for this day. He had stopwatch in hand immediately and was ready for the coaches role that he had prepared for. I don't want a coach, I thought. I want out of this experience right now. Too, late, you must grin and bear it. Breakfast was coming up and my delightful friend was quickly becoming a source of anxiety. I thought I had this in control. I thought that I was ready to be a mother. I was almost 25 years old. I had prayed and fasted about it, before even deciding to concieve and I was ready to quit before I had started from afew pains in the stomach. What a wuss? "Get rid of her!" I pleaded. "She can't see me like this!" He was mortified to think that I would say that. What happened to his godfearing wife ready to spend a Sunday, at the Lord's feet? He looked at me or looked for me in my eyes as if to say, where are you? You have to get rid of her. I can't pull myself together and we are going to have hours of this mess going on today. There was no class about crazy wives in the child birthing classes that we took. He had to wing it. He chose to accomodate me and speak to my dearest friend, for me. I think we both had dreamed of taking a trip and kissing oneanother goodbye and my coming back a mommy. Labor pains were coming on top of eachother and I was scared to death. There was no 5 minute break between, like they told us there would be and we were clearly at the beginning of the process. First babies can take hours or days to come, after the first labor pain and this was aweful. The love of my life and father of my baby took care of the outside obstacles to my sanity in delivery and I took care of trying to compose myself. I tried to figure out where it was hurting the worst. I couldn't get a grip of what to do first. Urge to push, pain, eggs, etc. I was not able to figure out what to do first. When dear friend went to church we called the midwife. Oh no, I had to talk on the phone to her, now? I hate the phone. Her voice was comforting. She knew what was going on. I said I am at 10. She said you are at 1. You can talk about your pain and you are civilized in your discussion with me. I said okay. We made the plans to meet her at the hospital and she assured me that we wouldn't deliver on the way, regardless of how bad I felt. I obeyed and my husband saw my eyes return to some semblance of self. This helped him, too. Why natural? Why so natural? I ask myself and we had so many reasons that I could never write them all. We were experts on what Dr. Bradley had said about childbirth and we were sure that we were doing what was best for our baby. Well, she got here. She was natural. Her daddy helped her be born and they bonded years before I forgave either one of them for what happened that day. I love being a mommy and I love that she is a woman now and waiting longer than I did to ever think of having a baby. Happy Birthday, Elyse!

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

What happened on election day.

I opened my eyes at 1 am to the sound of the radio. Classical music was comforting my dear hearted husband and I almost threw something at him and at the radio. I used self control, even at that time of the morning and put my feet on the floor and determined to do something else before dealing with the radio, which broke my unconsciousness. I will walk around and find something or someplace else to sleep was my thought. I shut off the heat or turned it down, muttering and sputtering in my semiconscious state and then returned to the room to deal with the radio situation. I stood over the bed, probably with a look on my face that told the story. I was deciding which end of the radio to yank. My dear one opened his eyes and looked adoringly at me... Are you alright? He knew I was livid! He touched the button and shut off the cocophony that disturbed me. He acted the hero and he saved the radio from being totally destroyed. It was the time of night, not the music persay, but the sound breaking my sleep. He went on to sleep and I mesmerizingly stumbled back to bed and fell back to rem before I even knew it. Thank God for restraints. The children were home today. How delightful to have them home? Maybe. We had a doctors appt. early and thats great to get out of the house before the children. We did. I don't know why we don't do date morning, instead of date night. We were both at our greatest consciousness in the morning. We enjoyed the sights and sounds of the city, this morning. (We) Got a great report from the doctor, voted and went home. What a beautiful day? Now we deal with the children. :{

Monday, November 5, 2012

We are so rich in brotherly love! {A brother is born for adversity?} Oh Yes!

We are so grateful to be born into a loving and large family. We know what it means to be loved through adversity and conflict. When a heart attack comes, we are tackled and embraced and hit and comforted and uplifted and pressed down by brotherly and sisterly love. The voices that call are familiar and the angry tones are all against the same foe...sickness. It seems that God could use all that love to dispell sickness altogether. I am sure He will, oneday. But, not in the family, in the Savior. As strong and as contemptible as sickness is it is only vanquished in Christ and not in brotherly love. We bask and sometimes are sunburned by the love of many brothers and sisters. There is nothing like it. I always duck when they come. I always duck and am still tackled by it. We are aware of the love and we feel it profusely, even when we duck from it. It is born from the same parents and it is palpable. We have birthed that kind of love in our home and are nurturing it and trying to teach them to harness and use it for the glory of God and not just consume it upon their own lusts. It is our dearest treasure, next to Heaven itself. It is only when we have to ride the bucking bronco of brotherly adversity, during election time and sickness, that we lament some of the elements of brotherly lovingness, or the magnitude of the lovingness that we are connected to. It is a gift, anyhow. We are blessed to have it. God bless the arguments and the conflicts that they may be used by God to defeat all conflict and sickness and death, in the "ONE DAY!" Today, just help us live to tell about it. "Don't let us be smothered under the leaves of the day."

Saturday, November 3, 2012

UGGGGHMMMMPHS! We may never learn!

Today was my delightful Senior Enoch's first attempt at the SAT's. There is always drama at our house when somebody has something to do. Especially on Saturdays. We are a big family and the things that only children families take for granted are huge hurdles for us. Class trips, homework, etc and now SAT completion.
Last year there were some hurdles, but this year we thought we had this under the belt. En said, Ma, I got this. I believed him. Every couple of days, I checked in, "Do you have a photo ID?" I am sure that I asked this of him, several times. Each time, he smiled maturely and showed me the photo that he printed out from the computer with the application. In the new cyber world this meant to me that they were checking the identity at the time of application and that there would be no further discussion. Still, I remember how very many times we didn't have our photo id's for this or that other important situation. This wouldn't be one of those times, I am sure. Still we woke up this morning 5 something, the menfolk pried me out of my bed for this. I was not up to it. I thought SAT completion was part of the father's job description, I murmered as I got out of my freezing cold part of the bed. I shook the icicles off my eyelids and started to reminisce of the preparation I started when my children were born for the SAT's. Ben said shut up, Jayne, not quite that concisely, but that is what he meant. Don't go there now. All my dreams were dashed at the break downs. Now, the father would care about those things and he has gotten us through two sets of SAT's flawlessly. I didn't recognize those personalities, though. This guy was me and dad. Ben doesn't know what that means. It means we know what we know, but we don't know what we don't know. We would find this out ere'long. We got coffee and some McDonald's Breakfast for the testtaker. We didn't lament the lack of prep work much, because he had had his own break to deal with. We would let him take the first SAT cold and then see what we have to do to get him to average score. We had been to the test site for Em 4 years ago, so that was not an issue. Reminiscing the high stress moments of my life, were somewhat tolerated, if not accepted. I said, this is what I do... We took a walk around the campus and met a couple of people, left him at the door and went home. We argued all the way home, as parents do. You should have said this. You should have done that. We pecked eachother to bits. We walked in the house ready to start our day, after our catharsis. The family was waiting to tell us that En was waiting for us. He had no picture id with him. Who knew? Back to the drawing board:)

Title- The Studious One!

Title-  The Studious One!
artwork by Elyse

Of biscuits and syrup

Of biscuits and syrup
tasty treats

Happy Saturday!

Happy Saturday!
a day at the Raptor Center.

Widdle Emmie in outer space school

Emmie jumped on the bus and off it flew out into the atmosphere. There was a set of clouds with turbulence right above the house and it took a few minutes for my Emmie to buckle her seatbelt. They hit the bump hard and it knocked my Emmie out of her seat and she bumped her head. The video camera came on and the monitor looked through and stated, Ms. Emmie, where are you? You are not in your seat. Where are you? I am alright I fell because I hadn’t buckled correctly. Well jump up Emmie we have a long way to go and you have to be buckled there is entirely too much turbulence in the stratosphere for you to unbuckle now. As soon as we are through this weather system there will be straight sailing but right now you must buckle. Emmie scrambled into the seat with intensity and purpose now. She watched every cloud pass her window and her nose was pressed to the window trying to see the top of the house as it drifted slowly out of sight. Soon they were not only out of sight of the house, the sun came out brightly and just as quickly they were putting on the atmospherical breathing apparatus and the outerspherical lights. The ABA and the OL. These precautions were to make them appear to be satellites to the radar as they were out in the ionosphere. Emmie knew all about this now. She had gone to the orientation and had a good breakfast and it took them 20 minutes for her to get out past the atmospherical pull and to feel the zero gravity. It would be 15 minutes before the gravity simulators would take effect, a glitch in the system which was being worked on. Until then, they enjoyed the couple of minutes of floatation, while being connected to the seats by belt. The first thing they saw everyday was the strataflotsam. The items which had been dumped into the atmosphere by earlier generations. What would their generation do about this ecological waste area that remained floating above their heads? This was a question for the generations. For now it was the area that they had to guide through on the way to school.

Midnight at the OASIS

Midnight at the OASIS
Sunset in Huntersville

My little Emmie

ran to the bus on the first day of the last year of school. 2 buns on the side of her head. She kissed me and ran at dawn to the bus. She was starting the adventure of a lifetime. I would never see that little girl again, she was going to woman school!

My Father and I 1989

My Father and I 1989

to the tune of Parsley, Sage, Rosemary and Thyme


Are you going to Mary Immaculate?

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

Remember me to the one who lived there,

He once was a true love of mine,

Tell him to buy me an acre of land,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

Between the muddy Hudson in Jamaica Bay,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine,

Tell him to sow in it seeds of pure cream,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

And build Ice cream mountains and buildings of whipped cream,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine,

Tell him to reap them with sickles of M&M’s,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

And chew bubble gum and eat till we’re done,

Then, He’ll be a true love of mine.

Tell him to run it off down the motor parkway,

Apricots, Chocolate Cherries and Pie,

After your done 50 pushups

and jog down the West Side Highway,

Then he’ll be a true love of mine…

(Don’t wait for me today dad, The kids are sick again, My tummy’s bulging again, My heart is aching again, And now there’s no love there…)

He once was, a true love of mine….So, Girls, I do beg you don't miss your Daddy,Apricots, Chocolate cherries and Pie,You have one short chance to see him on this side, Go visit him and let your light shine.